Today my mom informed me she likes to make her plants have sex – yeah, that was really uncomfortable to hear. It came out of nowhere. She had a lily in her lap (we were on the way to my sister’s house and my mom bought both of us lilies for Mother’s Day) and she was messing with the pistil or whatever the male part of the flower is called and she was brushing it into the stamen (female part?) and that’s when she made the declaration. Weird..
Also, a few more Danny-isms for your delight. He came to see me “at work” or actually I have no idea why he was there – probably to get a coke because we don’t keep cokes in the house. Anyways, when I got home he mentioned (brace yourself) that I was “busier than a one armed paper hanger”. After my mom and I gave him the “you are a redneck” look he said, “Well, I could have said you were busier than a one-legged man in a butt kickin‘ contest.” These both remind me of when we said something was “smaller than a gnat’s behind”. Really, where does he come up with these things and why is it that my mom, brother, sister, and I are so normal? One of God’s miracles I guess….